Even the best partnerships can experience it. In the beginning, love ignites like wildfire before slowing down to a gentle glow. The heat in the bedroom could completely go out if you don’t occasionally add new fuel to the fire. In the beginning, the novelty of the relationship kept things interesting as you got to know one other’s bodies, preferences, and personalities.
It was simple to maintain the heat. That easy sexual connection diminished as you settled into the partnership, routines took hold, finances started to pile up, and/or kids entered the scene. Nowadays, it takes work to reignite an old romance. Tonight, change things up. Giving something different a shot could reignite the flame. Explore one or more of these 14 novel ideas for couples to try in bed.
1. Consider switching jobs

64 sexual postures are described in the Kama Sutra. After three or four, most couples are worn out. He and she each have one or two strategies that work best for them, and they consistently rely on those.
Such a sexual regimen might easily get boring. Want to try something new in bed? Try switching up your sex position. From one of the three starting places, every sex position starts.
- Rear entry versus face-to-face communication
- Standing, piled, or lying next to one another.
- She is on top, followed by him.
The others are variations of one of those.
But the possibilities are endless within those fundamental constraints.
You might try:
• Rear entry, him standing behind and her hunched over the bed.
• Reverse cowgirl stance, with his hips lifted and shoulders propped up on an ottoman.
• Reverse missionary, in which she pushes her vagina up and down on his penis while he sleeps on his back and tucks his legs back—great for roleplaying!
There is nothing wrong with switching back to the old position for the climax if you don’t like the new one.
But both of you may experience feelings you had no idea existed. Just be aware of your body, and avoid hurting yourself or your relationship. Even if the new job turns out to be a hilarious train wreck, it won’t be a catastrophe because it will give everyone something to bond over. Recall that sex is supposed to be enjoyable!
2. Either leave the lights on or turn them off
According to a survey of over 2,000 people, single people preferred having sex with the lights on. However, people who are married or who have been in relationships prefer to have affairs in a dim, ominous environment. In another study, it was discovered that males who were exposed to bright light for an extended period of time throughout the day had higher testosterone levels and experienced more sex drive.
Trying the opposite in bed is another option. Try keeping the lights on if you often prefer the security of darkness. He should try this out in bed in particular. Men are often visual beings. The anticipation of the rendezvous is increased by seeing her perform inappropriate acts on him. Try having sex in complete darkness if you’re typically in a “light-on” relationship. This one is fantastic for her to try in bed.
Women lead elaborate fantasies. She can be particularly attracted to the prospect of the unknown and unexpected.
3. Examine light bondage.

According to a study, between 2% and 62% of couples embrace BDSM, according to Magliano (2015). If that void hurts your head, keep in mind that the way the question is phrased counts. Anything from lightly holding your partner down to using handcuffs and ball gags could be considered BDSM.
The acronym “BDSM” is a portmanteau. It stands for “discipline and bondage, dominance and obedience, masochism and sadism.” Both the rush of power and the rush of helplessness excite couples.
It is typical for one spouse to favor dominance and the other to prefer submission (this is true of many couples that do not practice BDSM). Couples may occasionally reverse roles. Avoid using ropes or handcuffs right away. It’s simple for someone to get hurt. Try securing one another with silk scarves instead, perhaps using one to cover your eyes. No slipknots, as they can restrict the blood flow and stop it. Use a fixed knot, such as a bowline or a square knot.
Try light-hearted taunting with: • Feathers • Foods • Fingers • Tongues
A “safeword,” typically a word unrelated to the sex act like “banana” or “freight train,” is a crucial component in BDSM activity.
The session ends instantly, and all restraints are removed by the dominant partner when the submissive partner says the safeword. Safewords allow subordinates to say things like “No, please stop!” and the dominant will know it’s okay for them to go on. Keep in mind that BDSM is about the appearance of control and power between reliable partners.
4. Express your dreams
Don’t forget to ask your boyfriend or girlfriend for suggestions if you’re looking for new things to try in bed with them. Your partner might be ashamed of his or her sexual desires because they were seen negatively growing up.
In the wrong setting, some fantasies might be considered impolite or even politically incorrect. Make your relationship a place where you are both free to express your deepest aspirations. The riskiest recommendation on this list might be this one. You can wind up learning something about your partner that you didn’t want to know.
But it’s better to know now than to discover it later. You can also discover that after you carry out the idea, it no longer has the power to make you feel seductive when you masturbate.
5. Be shady

Many people feel restrained about having sexual conversations in bed, but if you run out of things to do in the bedroom, it may really spice things up. You might be worried about seeming silly if you’re not used to talking nasty.
In fact, if you yell, “Give it to me!” or “You’re a naughty girl!” half-heartedly, you can get laughter instead of groans. The key is to communicate your truth while being fully present in the situation and your feelings. Tell your spouse what you want to be done to him or her or what you want them to do to you without fear. Many people don’t want their sexual life to always be romantic.
They want to be treated like animals in bed, even with their lifelong companion.
6. Be Fierce
Rough bedroom play can be daunting, like BDSM. You might care deeply about this individual and not want to hurt them. Nevertheless, according to a survey conducted by OKCupid, 62% of women claimed they liked having sex that was rough.
This is open to interpretation, but examples include: biting; pulling hair; spanking; holding down a partner; taking control; slapping breasts, face, etc. These behaviors appear to be assault. They are assaults done without permission.
When engaging in rough play, do it exclusively with a partner you can trust and gradually increase the level of roughness. Verbal rough play, such as calling your partner a slut or verbally abusing them, is another type of rough play.
This might serve as a nice starting point. If one or the other spouse doesn’t like it, there’s little harm done if you can reconcile afterward.
7. Swallow
According to unofficial surveys, the majority of those who blowjob climax swallow the ejaculate. If you or your partner had previously objected to this, you might want to try it differently. It’s dirty, taboo, and (some people think) intimate to swallow semen, making it a terrific activity to try in bed with your partner.
Semen is 97% water, non-fattening, and only includes 2% sperm, which is good news for health-conscious people. Zinc is an important mineral that gives food a metallic taste. If a partner doesn’t like the taste of semen, the guy can try a few different ways to change it.
The flavor of semen is said to be improved by eating a lot of fruit and drinking fruit juices, whereas smoking and consuming alcoholic beverages are said to detract from the flavor. Even eating specific foods, such as deep-fried foods, coffee, broccoli, Brussels sprouts, meat, and dairy, can make semen taste unpleasant.
8. Anal Play

Anal is regarded as forbidden, a last resort, and the domain of gay males. Women and especially straight males, are not supposed to like it. The statistics reveal a different picture. According to an NIH survey, 37% of women and 43% of men had experienced anal sex at least once in their lifetimes. According to Herbenick et al. NSSHB .’s research from 2017, 43% of men and 37% of women believed that over 20% of them had anal intercourse in the previous year.
Many couples make these two serious anal-sex mistakes:
- Insufficient lubricant – Unlike the vagina, the anus is tighter and does not lubricate itself. Lubrication is required, ideally a thick, viscous lube composed of silicone or oil that will endure for a long time.
- Starting with anal contact – You build up to getting a 6 inch-penis in the butt. Start slowly by placing a lubricated finger in your partner’s anus, perhaps during a prearranged sex session. Go from little to larger butt plugs that are implanted during other sex actions.
Although not everyone enjoys anal, enough people do that it is worth a try, if only for the satisfaction of helping someone else break that social stigma.
9. Witness one another masturbating
Pay close attention—you could discover anything! When it comes to their masturbation habits, which they developed as adolescents while living with their parents, many people feel furtive and secretive.
Despite relationship sex being more emotionally satisfying, studies have found that people find masturbation to be more physically satisfying than partner sex. That may be the case since we are free to only think about ourselves. Maybe it’s because we are the only ones who can best satisfy ourselves.
Therefore, make masturbation a partner activity. Take the weight off of making each other happy and just make yourself happy in front of each other if you run out of things to do in bed. You might find that your method of contacting the penis or vagina in issue differs greatly from the way your spouse prefers to touch himself or herself.
During the subsequent hands-on session, try to mimic that contact with your hands and observe the results.
10. Massage trades
After a long day, having sex may feel like too much pressure, but who isn’t up for a massage? Take advantage of luxurious linens, relaxing music, and scented oils. Without the exertion of intercourse, it’s a terrific opportunity to appreciate each other’s bodies and make each other feel good. Who knows, sex might just occur in that calm, dopamine-rich state.
11. Dress up games
Another opportunity to take a chance on seeming ridiculous, but if you stick with it, sexual roleplaying may turn every sex session into a new adventure and a chance to explore taboo topics like ethnic fetishization, power dynamics, and intergenerational relationships.
Dress-up ideas include Tarzan and Jane; the Queen and the Peasant; the Employee and the Boss; the Student and the Teacher; the Cheerleader and the Coach; the Prisoner and the Guard; the Prostitute and the Solicitor; the Athlete and the Physical Therapist; the Old and Young; the Knight and the Damsel; Spiderman and Mary Jane; and the Doctor and the Patient.
12. Alternate Power Roles

It might be a welcome change of pace for the submissive partner to take control of the evening and initiate, decide the position, act rough, and speak abusively. Many couples only have one dominant partner.
Even if you don’t enjoy it, at least you have a greater understanding of what it’s like for the other spouse.
13. Don’t leave the bed.
Leaving the bedroom is one of the best methods to experiment in the bedroom.
Take your sex session wherever in your house you feel most comfortable after you are certain of your privacy.
The sofa, a kitchen counter, a dining room table, a home office desk, a walk-in closet, a toilet, a swimming pool, a balcony, the back seat of a car, the ground up against a wall, or the car’s hood are all possibilities.
Sex that takes place outside of the bedroom has a heated, impulsive vibe of impatience because you can’t keep your hands off each other and are too lazy to enter the bedroom.
You might have even engaged in some of that type of sex at the beginning of the relationship.
There’s always the option to recapture those heady days of sex on the ottoman if you run out of things to do in bed!
14. Include a Delicious Item
Think about playing with food: chocolate sauce, marshmallows, strawberries, eating off each other’s sushi, dousing each other in champagne, etc. There are further choices like edible lubricant or undergarments.
Conclusion
It’s worth the effort. Sex matters, to put it mildly. The bond between them is kept together by it. According to studies, partnerships in the current era begin to falter and end after just five unsatisfactory sex experiences. Before it’s too late, one spouse might not even express their unhappiness. Don’t wait for that difficult discussion. Now is the time to add some spice and get the rewards of a revitalized sexual life.
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